Birthday Week

Time marches on . . . . This week I turn  54.  What can I say about that ?   Since the joy of turning 18,with all my life ahead of me, and the trauma I experienced, albeit self induced, when I turned 25 and my life assessment disheartened me; married 7 years, 2 children, one of them strong willed and hyperactive, a tough ministry and needed growth in our marriage and spiritual life, all while many of my friends were not carrying the weight of such heavy life experiences and seemingly having "fun". 

I must say with all sincerity that my 50's, so far, have been the best years of my life.  Not that the previous years were  not wonderful in their own right. But I have ceased striving to 'find myself' years ago, and am enjoying the person God made me to be.  I have also ceased trying to make my husband the man I think he should be and and thoroughly enjoying what God has created in him using all the pain, struggle, and unique experiences that we have walked through. Steve is a compassionate, sensitive, loyal husband who has learned how to encourage and protect me.  He seeks the Lord for the wisdom and courage to be the husband, father, and minister that he has been called to be.  Our children are amazing people, each one in their own right.  I am blessed.

Some how the same things that would have sent me into a spiraling depression or an anxiety charged fit, are managed (most of the time) with prayer and an acknowledgement that God is sovereign and has control of our situation and that of our children.  I am not a victim in life's difficult situations, rather a loved child of my Heavenly Father.  

Now, I am watching my children go through many of the same experiences and feelings that Steve and I went through.  Giving them to the Lord, daily, I can be at peace and live and love, enjoying the years that the Lord has ordained for me.

O.K. so I am 15 to 20 lbs. overweight, wrinkles refuse to be 'hidden', and my energy and turn around time are decreasing and increasing accordingly, but in my year 54 life assessment, I would not change anything . . . . God is good and so is life!